Silke's Journal [entries|friends|calendar] Silke [ website | No coffee, no workee ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

(2 donuts | coffee?) [18 Dec 2004|01:28am] Well, we got here ok :) My neices insisted on staying up until we arrived, but the youngest just couldn't make it, so she was sleeping by then XD The older girl was awake though. She only managed to peek shyly at my boy before running into bed. He wasn't too offended at least, lol. There'll be time for extended introductions tomorrow. We sat up till late with some tea and my sister though, I think it went well :D

(coffee?) [16 Dec 2004|11:18pm] I am SO EXCITED. My vacation starts TOMORROW XD XD XD The boy and I are driving out tomorrow evening, we should get there around 10. I hope he'll be ok, we tend to speak Japanese at home ^^; I wish Mama was still alive. She liked my ex as much as anyone, and I'm sure she'd love my new boy at least as much as I do *hearts*

(coffee?) [06 Nov 2004|12:39pm] I got my vacation time for Christmas. A week at home with my sisters, and a week with my boy <3 We're going to a Chinese opera, I'm really excited! I think Kirin is feeling a little better. His boy dumped him three days after getting back from Hawaii. >.>;;; got my hair done the other day... it looks so good XD

(coffee?) [25 Oct 2004|10:29pm] [ mood | guilty ] Boy wasnt happy with me on friday... Thursday night, I went to dinner with a friend and got too drunk to drive safely.. fell asleep on his couch. Didnt call to say I was going to be late, or ask for a ride, or anything, which is probably the main reason why he was upset. I can't blame him... i really should have called. ~_~

(coffee?) [16 Oct 2004|10:01pm] Funny, how time passes.. it seemed like so long, but he finished whatever work was keeping him busy just over a week ago and wow, was it ever nice.. I think we were trying to make up for the lost time, such as it was... Yeah, my nights were busy *WINK* Well Kirin's birthday was last week, but he was in Hawaii with his boy for it. Good for him; he needed a vacation! When he got back, I took him out for dinner, theatre, a club.. Crap, it was like 3 AM when I finally got him home, hehehe. And closer to 4 when I got there. Hyuga was sleeping; he barely even stirred when I climbed into bed, and I think it was because my feet were cold. And the funniest thing! Women were ALL OVER Kirin at the club, it was hilarious!

(coffee?) [22 Sep 2004|12:27am] [ mood | loved ] This one is going to be quick.. I just got up for a potty break and had to make this comment... and I hope you're reading this, mr i think we should see other people while you'd been fucking someone else for 2 years behind my back My darling boyfriend has been home for three nights running and I couldn't be happier. Today he was even back in time for dinner, we grilled some fish out on the bbq, had a couple drinks and some smokes and went for a looooooooooooong walk on the beach.. the nights are getting cooler now. We came back in long after sunset, had some hot chocolate and I told him about my snake.. which I kept at Kirin's, but im sure he'll be happy to let me keep it here now lol.. and thats all cool. Then he proceeded to make love to me like he hasnt since the last time we were out on the boat. He makes me feel so... warm, appreciated, protected, cherished, loved... so many more adjectives than I can think of. We've only been dating for 6 months, and I never ever ever want to be without him, I love him too much. <3

(coffee?) [18 Sep 2004|12:04am] I'm trying to make myself at home here. Still adjusting; the boy's home is sooo much bigger than mine was, I still feel a little like I'm only an overnight guest, not a semi-permanent resident. My fish are settling in fine though. Not in the big tanks with his... their own... Been missing my boy too. He's been working so much, last night he was at work so late that I went to bed without waiting up... At first it made me sad.. but then I figured I better get used to it, it'll happen a lot more when he starts touring. just too much time to myself to think..

(coffee?) [10 Aug 2004|12:40am] Boy asked me to move in with him. I said yes. And he gave me a ring. and i finally told him those Big Words (oooooh).. his reaction was.... quite pleaseing *smug*

(coffee?) [05 Jun 2004|10:45pm] I had a lot of things I wanted to talk about, but i forgot most of them. The most important one.. I nearly burned the building down yesterday. I got out all of my old magazines and was flipping through them just for nostalgia's sake. I guess I got a little drunk by myself too.. That was one thing that man always told me, never drink alone. And kinda high. Bad combination in a mood like that. So i was looking through the magazines, drunk and high, and generally enjoying myself. And then I came upon the issues where my ex's band showed up. At first I was ok.. I.. kinda sobered up looking at those pictures. At first it was fun.. nostalgic. It was from before I met him. I liked looking at them. It was before his anorexia, before I knew how insecure he really was. I will stay say that he is an attractive man, at least in those pictures. But the more magazines I went through, seeing his face repeatedly, the worse I started to feel. It started in my stomach. By the time I got through about a year's worth, I felt positively nauseous. I ached from neck to knee. That's when I grabbed all the mags with him in them, and lit fire to them in the kitchen sink. I try to forget about it, but his betrayal never leaves my mind. How he could say those things to me with such a straight face, I will never understand. At this moment, I hate him, and everything he ever meant to me.

(coffee?) [25 May 2004|09:08pm] Been so busy at work that I hadn't had time to see my boy for a week. spoke on the phone a couple times but that was about it. I missed seeing him! but when I did again, it was just so... romantic *,* he brought me flowers in the evening. then we just lay around and cuddled and kissed and that was it. It was so relaxing and wonderful.

(coffee?) [12 May 2004|10:12pm] It occured to me today how strangely obsessed with sex people are. Myself included :P I'm starting to wonder if I really, really, REALLY mean it when I say that sex is not all that I love my boy for. Obviously it's a fantastic experience to the relationship, but there's so much more than that... I want to start listing off things, but I don't know where to start. well.. His smile. The first time I saw him smile - really smile - I was a little shocked... He laughed and then he grinned for a few seconds after it.. I can still see it so clearly. just snowballed down the hill from there...

(coffee?) [05 May 2004|09:37pm] I talked to my doctor the other day. he suggested abstaining from sex for at least 2 weeks. Can you tell how excited I am by that prospect?

(coffee?) [01 May 2004|10:15pm] I saw my ex tonight as we were leaving the restaurant. He was leaning against a sleek car, I think it was a Jaguar, smoking. I don't know if he saw me though. I did have to wonder to myself who he was fuxxing to get a ride like that.

(coffee?) [25 Apr 2004|11:15pm] I had something I wanted to say, but I can't remember what it was ^^; been spending time with the boy, of course. He hasn't been sleeping very well, if at all, i can tell. But it doesn't seem to be affecting him too badly, so i can't be too worried... i just love being with him. Especially he gets assertive and feral and teases me like that. i like being devoured....

(coffee?) [20 Apr 2004|08:32pm] I had a startling revelation the other night.. i thought, What if this is the way he treats ALL of his lovers? like.. before the show, we were... well okay, we were making out, having forgotten what time people were showing up. They almost got a free show (maybe they did? My shirt didnt come down that far) actually. so then the other people showed up, and the boy greeted them much like he would have greeted me. Maybe at first I was like "wtf?" and it lasted all of a heartbeat.. I mean, I kiss Kirin hello and goodbye.. and besides, I know i get the lion's share of the affection anyway, so big deal. We discussed that the other night; I really don't mind. just made me think: hes probably this fabulous to anyone lucky enough to get his attention that way. Now i don't have to feel so bad for falling in love ^o^

(coffee?) [18 Apr 2004|11:08pm] So much for staying home for a couple days... its becoming more than sex. It's the closeness I feel while doing it. it... kinda frightens me, happening so soon...

(coffee?) [17 Apr 2004|02:54am] its... odd being here alone. It's weird.. On the one hand, its perfectly okay; this is still my place, because when we're together, 99.9% of the time, it's at his place. on the other hand, the silence is deafening. Its not an aural silence.. Its the silence of an apartment that only has one person living in it. It's.. kinda creepy. I don't know what to think anymore. I feel like I don't belong in this apartment; this place is from my former life, after all I was here with my ex too, and it was tough enough just erasing his memory from the walls. (figuratively speaking) I don't really want to stay here anymore. but I can't just invite myself to move in, nor would I accept at this point even if he offered. It's simply too soon. it's only been a month. It feels like a lot longer; I mean we've already reached point where it's not a desperate pressing need to have sex every day, at least three times. Most of the week I was there, we just went to bed and snuggled until we fell asleep. The heat of his skin and the sound of his heart beating and his breathing was enough for me. and then there was the fabulous sex on the beach.. drinks and otherwise. If I hold still I can still feel his hips rocking into mine, pressing hard and deep. It's a pleasant memory. it all comes down to what I feel for the boy...

(coffee?) [16 Apr 2004|05:44pm] I was going to call in sick again today, but I couldn't. Not only did they need me, but once I got moving, it wasn't so bad XD yeah, i got pounded again. It was great. Gotta be home to do my fish again, and Kirin is coming over too. Gonna be weird not being around the boy O_O

(coffee?) [10 Apr 2004|12:44am] [ mood | dumbstruck ] I didn't know any of that. being intimate is going to be different from now on, I think, but in a good way...

(coffee?) [06 Apr 2004|11:34pm] [ mood | content ] what a long day... I went in early to make up for the work I missed yesterday, and I was tehre from.. about 8 am until 8 pm. I had to borrow one of the boy's shirts again though. I'm surprised I didn't have a headache. Anyway, I called him after, but he wasn't home and his cell was off, so I went home and had a microwave dinner (yay for pizza) and changed and cleaned my fish tanks, and then the boy surprised me (in my fish-cleaning gear >.>) with champagne and strawberries *,* later XD

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